Sometimes someone is knowingly hurtful or neglectful. On the other hand, sometimes actions speak louder than words, and our interpretations may be accurate. We may feel convinced someone intended to be rude, inconsiderate, or thoughtless when really that wasn’t the case. On the one hand, we often create a lot of meaning in our heads that isn’t really there. I wanted to believe they valued me-that it only meant I was interpreting incorrectly if their actions seemed to suggest otherwise.īut this is where it gets confusing. And I stayed in a lot of unhealthy relationships while making excuses for people. I refused to consider that someone’s actions might reflect that they didn’t truly care. Once you moved yourself into the latter category, there was no going back.Įventually, I realized I was limiting my relationships by not recognizing the grey area, where people are human, they make mistakes, and they need forgiveness and understanding.įrom there I swung the pendulum the other way-I trusted everyone. I either trusted you implicitly, assuming you’d never intentionally hurt me, or believed you wanted to cause me pain and questioned everything you did. There was a time when I was quite black-and-white with relationships. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than hurt yourself trying to put them back together.” ~Unknown

Getting my hurr did